abstract thoughts prose

I live in the inbetween

the night. the black, pre-dawn hours are mine and mine alone. i am free to follow my mind where it leads and do as i please. my pursuits are pure and selfish. i hold no obligations to another in these moments of existence. i fall down the rabbit hole of an inner world and lose sense of time. until it crashes upon me once more – sped ahead to the slow motion of dawn.

have you ever noticed how dawn is at once a slow and gradual awakening, a groggy one-eye-at-a-time yawn and stretch and yet the ephemeral light of sunrise is changing at every second, and you are taken by surprise at the transformation from dark to light? as if the day had slow rolled out of bed and then popped upright to its feet all of a sudden.

i find, once the dawn breaks, that i feel beholden again, obligated to people and the world once more. that i have lost a bit of my freedom and frivolity. i must once more settle down to business. i must move about as others do. i must follow the norm of daylight hours, waiting eagerly for the night to come again, so i may be free in the inbetween.

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